Journal Entry - Fri 4/10/09

Well, I took a break from the running after the Veteran’s Run last November. I went back to the elliptical machine and walking through the holidays. On January 1, I found myself trying to figure out what I was going to do to keep myself motivated to exercise everyday. I had accomplished becoming a member of the “500 Mile Club” at the YMCA in 2008. I knew I didn’t want to try to walk another 500 miles in 6 months. It was taking up too much of my day to set such a high goal. I also knew that if I didn’t set a goal that was difficult, I would probably quit. My mind returned to running. Now that was definitely a challenge. After all, I hate running. I thought about the satisfaction I had felt when I participated in Run for the Fallen and the Veteran’s Walk/Run. I decided that my goal for 2009 was to become enough of a jogger that I could participate in events without difficulty. My husband has always been a runner so it would be nice to do these events with him.

I started out running just one mile. Each week I slowly increased my distance. Doing this gradually kept me from experiencing a lot of muscle soreness. Today, I am happy to say that I run three miles daily. I usually walk another mile or two depending on how much time I have to spend at the YMCA. I will be honest. I still don’t enjoy running but I don’t struggle until I am in the middle of the third mile. My biggest struggle with the third mile is fighting the desire to stop. I’m hot and sweaty and somewhat tired, but the reality is that I don’t have to stop so I force myself to keep going. I remind myself that my heroes don’t quit when things get tough so I can’t quit either. The reward is reaching the end of that third mile and knowing I didn’t give into my lazier side. If I wasn’t worried about people in the gym thinking I was crazy, I would probably scream and throw my arms up at the end of each day’s workout!

Journal Entry - Mon. 3/16/09

For the past 5 or 6 months, I have been working on the STEPS to HONOR program. It is a dream of mine to get an awareness program started that will motivate people to purposefully set aside time each day to honor our American heroes. I’ve given the program a lot of thought. The program isn’t about who can run the fastest mile or who can run the longest distance. It is simply about honoring those who selflessly serve for you and for me. It has to be a program in which anyone can participate. It can be as easy or as difficult as you choose for it to be. I see two benefits from participating. The first benefit - you will be forever changed if you really take the time to honor our heroes. The second benefit - you will get in better shape!

The reason this program is called STEPS to HONOR and not something such as RUN to HONOR is because not all of us are runners. I can personally tell you that I hate to run. Until recently, I had never run more than a mile without stopping. I had not ever had the interest to push myself in that way.....until I participated in Run for the Fallen last August. As I mentioned earlier, I had begun an exercise program earlier in the year. I had been walking at the YMCA and taking a few exercise classes in an effort to strengthen muscles and better cope with a permanent disability with which I live. I had gotten in the habit of exercising about 5 days a week so I was much more prepared to run a mile than I had been in years. I decided that I was going to participate in Run for the Fallen, and I was going to actually jog rather than walk.

August 24, 2008 was a HOT day in Lexington, Kentucky. As the group headed out to run the mile long trek, I immediately noticed that it was a lot harder to run in the heat than it was to jog in the A/C on a treadmill. About 1/4 of a mile down and I was beginning to think I was crazy! I refused to quit and kept on running. At the half mile point, I was really hot and ready to stop, but I was determined that I would not quit. The last half mile was extremely difficult, but I kept telling myself that I could do this. Certainly the men and women that have served on my behalf suffered much more than I was suffering.....and they had made the ultimate sacrifice on my behalf. There was no way I was going to stop running until I got to the finish line or dropped dead trying to get there! Somehow, I managed to make it to the finish line. I had struggled, but somehow I did make it to the end. The entire time that I was suffering, I was reminded of the names written on my racer’s bib. As I ran and struggled to breathe, I spent time thinking about the individuals I was honoring with my run. I prayed for their families and asked God to give them what they needed to keep on going in this world without their loved one that had made the ultimate sacrifice. I thanked the Lord for His grace and the blessing of living in a land of liberty and for those that had made that possible through their service.

Journal Entry - Thurs. 8/28/08

Participating in Run for the Fallen has given me a lot to consider. Just yesterday, I was pushing myself to run a mile on a very hot day. Today, I am back to running on a treadmill inside the air conditioned gym. It occurs to me that I might just run today’s mile for one of my fallen heros. I typically run 1 mile, walk 2 miles, and do about three miles on the elliptical cross trainer. I quickly came to the realization my daily six miles could be used to honor six heroes. I walked in honor of the six men that I had worn on my bib yesterday during Run for the Fallen. I found that the time went by much more quickly. Instead of looking down at the display to see how much farther I had to go, I was filling my mind with thoughts of gratitude for what these Marines had done for me. I thought about their funerals, and their families.....which led me to pray for their loved ones. How difficult each day must be for them! Before I knew it, I was on the next mile and my thoughts switched to the next hero on my list. It was on that day that I found a new reason to run. I honestly hate running, but I was interested in the idea that I could spend the time honoring someone that had made the ultimate sacrifice for me. I have decided that to honor someone’s sacrifice with a little bit of suffering really causes me to think. Whenever I feel like stopping, I just remind myself that the hero I run for didn’t stop when he was tired. He didn’t stop until God called him home. It’s hard to be a quitter when you think like that! I’m coming back tomorrow and I am going to run in honor of a few more heroes that served on my behalf.

Journal Entry - Wed 8/27/08 - Run for the Fallen

Last weekend I was invited to participate in Run for the Fallen. I have been working out a lot lately, and while I am no runner, I figured I could run a mile for a good cause. The concept was simple. Join others across the nation and run in honor of a fallen hero. A group of people actually ran from Ft. Irwin, California to Arlington National Cemetery in Washington, DC. They began their journey on June 14 and finished on August 24.

I don’t recall the actual temperature on the day we ran, but I do know that it was HOT! Not only was it hot, it was humid! My goal was to run the entire mile, but as we headed out, I wondered if I was being realistic. The only time I run is inside the YMCA where there is a nice padded track and a working air conditioner. I typically run distances less than a mile, so I was definitely taking on a challenge.

As I continued, I started thinking about the list of fallen heroes I had pinned to my shirt. I was wearing the names of six fallen Marines…..all who had some sort of tie to my own son, a USMC Sergeant who happens to be deployed.

I became more and more tired, and more and more hot, but as I pondered the lives of these heroes, I realized that my efforts on this hot August day were really not much of a sacrifice. I think about our military everyday. I think about them 24/7. My son is on his third deployment as I run this mile in honor of his friends. I can read through the list of fallen heroes and I can say that I have met a number of their family members….but do I honestly stop and really consider what these did for me in more than just a passing thought? Do I think about how difficult it must be for the family members that must go on without their fallen hero? On most days, the honest answer is no. Most days, I am busy living the American Dream just like everybody else. As I run, I realize that every single man listed on my bib not only endured heat and fatigue far worse than what I was experiencing in this moment, but these men had also made the ultimate sacrifice by giving their lives! Each one sacrificed for people like me, unknown to them. Each one sacrificed for the good of our nation. Each one had a life here in the USA that they did not have to give up to serve others. Each one was loved and cherished by family and friends....each a brother, sister, son, daughter, wife, husband, parent, friend, and neighbor.

As I continued running, with each step, the thoughts of fatigue were replaced with the excitement of knowing that I was pushing myself beyond my comfort zone to make people more aware of our heroes and their sacrifice. Not only was this effort making others more aware of their sacrifice. It was making ME more aware of their sacrifice!